TEN OTHER NAMES FOR A PENIS – Americas Bestselling author Rick Riordan once said: “Names have Power” and what we name things becomes the manifestation of what we once proclaimed with my mouths.  MANSCAPED, a popular mens sex and masculinity blog once looked at weird and kinky names guys call their penises. We take a look at 10 of the 100 names that caught our attention:




1. Anaconda  

This snake is thick, possess a big head and moves gradually towards its pray. With its deadly ability of striking without announcing itself. It makes sense that the penis is compared to this deadly reptile. Did I also mention that anacondas are always found in wetlands that are forested. 

2. That Thing

Seeing the penis in the flesh can be quiet overwhelming and the initial view can leave one speechless. So words like “That Thing” can be enough for the moment. 

3. Master Sword 

If your an avid fan of Zelda, then you would know that the Master Sword is one of the worlds most dangerous weapons. Should you be going to the war of the bedroom with your partner, you have to bring a great weapon to the battlefield. 

4. Lizard

If you’ve ever heard someone say they’re going to go “drain the lizard,”  you should know that they going to take their penis for a spin.

5. Joystick 

Those who love video games know that the joystick is a very important component to the game. No fun can be had without the joystick so always make sure you have the joystick handy and let the bedroom games begin. 

6. Tool 

If our body was considered to be a human body-kit then the penis would be the ALL-IN-ONE tool. The real MR FIX IT. 

7. Pleasure Pump 

We get water-pumps, gear-pumps, diaphragm-pump and now we have the PLEASURE-PUMP. Guaranteed to pump some pleasure to your partner. 


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8. Vagina Miner 

Sounds like a famous line from a prominent rapper but this simply means is that the penis is the miner and the vagina is great hole that produces the gold. 

9. The Boner 

By definition a boner is a stupid mistake and one must admit that a lot of the mistakes we make as guys is because of The Boner. 

10. Sausage

No matter the size or flavor of the sausage, everyone enjoys its meaty taste including the sumptuous juices that splash in mouth as soon as you bite. Same thing? I guess so. 


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